#but also i like to think it's lola and milo's kind of friendship

[mrs-nate-humphrey]

aight aight, real shit; let's say you got the chance to rewrite the entirety of gossip girl exactly how you want. make a brief description of what would happen in each season. (you can decide whether there's a fourth season or not)

oh i LOVE this ask, and i am so flattered to be asked this, haha. i have SO many thoughts, i’ve been thinking about this non-stop, but i’ll try to be as brief as possible. also, disclaimer, i don’t remember all the seasons equally clearly. like i barely remember s2. haha, whoops.

season 1: i love this season as is, for the most part. i think the tone of it was actually very serious and involved? like the show was actively trying not to be frivolous with heavy topics, and the way we were getting to see the characters seemed like they were trying to bring out character depth and the complexities of their lives in very deliberate ways. nate’s whole thing with his parents gets so much focus, and it’s not something the show glorifies, it’s something that is meant to make you uncomfortable and worried for him. 

i would have nate be less of a dudebro, jenny & nate’s friendship being a little more solid, dan being a little more involved in jenny’s problems + helping her find her space, vanessa/nate to happen earlier - after nate breaks up w/ blair and realises she looks happier, i would have him not try and get back with her (lol, dude, the fact that she’s happy after breaking up with you means you probably shouldn’t be dating her.) more exploration of eric’s mental health. more dan and blair friendship. i would keep chair the way it is this season. i would not have a derena breakup - i’d have them take a break after the georgina reveal and get back together during the summer after talking about it and deciding to be more honest & open with each other. and, what the hell, i would have lily not blame serena (???) for being taken advantage of in the whole pete fairman situation. serena wasn’t sober, she was 16, that dude was in his 30s, georgina was taping her w/o her consent. how is any of this serena’s fault??? i hate lily’s reaction so much.

season 2: i... don’t remember enough of this season, sadly. it’s been too long since i watched it. i would majorly change jenny’s arc here, though. eleanor stealing her dress was majorly, majorly fucked up, and i think jenny should’ve done something then and there. also the whole thing with ‘lily is a mother to chuck’.... i would’ve loved it if lily had been like that to jenny. the girl needed it, and lily would’ve actually been able to help jenny establish connections in the professional world and whatnot. i think jenny should’ve transferred out of constance - not necessarily homeschooling maybe, but gone somewhere else. unlike dan, she didn’t even want to get into an ivy, she wanted to make it big as a designer. so. that. 

oh nate my love. i’d get this trainwreck of a boy some therapy. while i hate that the catherine thing happened, things like that do happen all the time, and i’d be interested in sort of handling the aftermath of it in a responsible way. i would not have... a lot of serena’s arc and decisions (from what i can remember) were really random in this season. i’d have her break up with dan at some point. and vanessa would need a new subject for her short film, and she’d choose serena.

nate doesn’t really date anyone, this season. but he and jenny open up to each other abt having gay crushes on people who treat you like shit - jenny’s thing with agnes - nate rescues her when they’re taking those pictures in her flat and let’s say she doesn’t go back to agnes. instead of kissing her, nate talks to her instead, and tells her about carter, tells her about chuck. and jenny talks about her feelings for blair, her feelings for agnes. and both of them sort of go... “it sucks, but all we can do is try not to become the kind of people we hate, right?”

dan pines for nate. majorly. massively. obviously. i think the only person who really notices is blair, and this would lead to new hijinks and shenanigans. also!! i do not want chair in s2. maybe it can go there for a bit but definitely not to the extent in canon. i want blair to have the same moment of being unable to deny her cruelty / needing to be accountable that she did in that ‘age of dissonance’ play. and. this sounds fucky but i want the dan/rachel stuff to stay as it is, and later, in s4, for dan & serena to talk about rachel & ben respectively and be like ‘hey, this was a fucked up thing to happen to us, wasn’t it?’ 

i would also like to get to know blair’s “minions” better as people. i mean. they all seemed hella fascinating to me, and the show’s decision to make them superficial and unidimensional was very depressing.

season 3: hot garbage, throw canon away. when chuck goes away to paris or wherever, let him not come back. goodbye, dude! dan, blair & vanessa friendship at nyu is so, so important to me. also im losing my mind always at how vanessa and serena catch dan on that walk of shame and they’re both like ‘college is a time for experimentation!’ and nobody does anything even slightly bisexual (unless you count that threesome later, which, blah.) a serenessa / date dynamic in college would’ve been great. dan transferring to columbia like blair does and rooming with nate and just, the gayness of it all. dan & blair become really, really close, and d&b&v watch movies + go to art exhibits together and are all SO DAMN PRETENTIOUS. serena finds it sexy, nate finds it terrifying. 

the william stuff would be interesting if he were actually held accountable. like that man has no right being a doctor, and medical malpractice needs to be brought up. and jenny’s whole arc this season makes me so sad. i think it would’ve been interesting if she’d been a ‘queen’ and ruled alongside eric, and just, the two of them forcing people to be nice, sort of like they try to do with people who are mean to nelly in s2 i think it is? but also.. jenny out of constance is very good, and i think i mentioned that earlier, haha, whoops.

season 4 : serenessa breakup, for whatever reason, probably to do with the william fuckery, because i think vanessa would react in similar ways to nate (”serena, i know he’s your dad, but we have to do the right thing” / “it still wasn’t your call to make” / “he’s a certified doctor, serena, a man like that has no right -” / “god vanessa, you really don’t get it, do you?” ). uhhh i would actually... if i had to choose i would honestly go blairnessa >>>>> dair. i love how blair & vanessa can keep each other on their toes and hold each other accountable. like? blair’s classist or racist and dan’s just like, *smiles*. vanessa would actively be like ‘hey, stop that.’ (this is one of the few actual criticisms i have about d/b as a relationship, RIP.) 

(edited to add: yeah, i think blairnessa WOULD be a sustainable relationship, more abt that here! )

yes to the milo arc, but dan gets to keep milo (his friends threaten georgina and go all ‘you made him sign the certificate. don’t make us take you to court’ because i love these morally grey assholes but also because g DID trick dan into thinking milo was his and dan was ready to reshape his whole life around that kid which is more than georgina was willing to do. plus endgame: jack/georgina are not parents i want milo to have.) i would also have more of a rufus & dan fallout over the milo thing. i think rufus would be really nasty about it all tbh.

the dair arc for blair and vanessa! let the juliet stuff happen, but let it be less awful + let it be seen as Bad + let serena get help & not forgive her for it. let serena NOT date ben after, what the hell. i want d&s to talk about their shared feelings for high school teachers and to realise, in retrospect, as adults, that what happened was crossing lines. let blair and vanessa suddenly drop dan and do the movies + galleries stuff on their own. and dan’s like ??? but he’s busy being a parent with nate supporting him. dan’s drama is very much parenting things. there would be some nonsense involving nate’s family pushing back, because ‘we stood by while you dated him, nate, we thought it was a phase. but raising a child with another man? this is unacceptable.’ i would like nate to get disowned by the family, and need to find his own feet. and to get a REAL SHOT AT HAPPINESS away from that terrible environment.

season 5: i want this to be a good serena season. let her find her calling doing creative things. let her and carter travel the world. let her just be whoever she wants to be. let her and vanessa patch their friendship up. let her have an open relationship with carter, let her have a lot of sex with a lot of random people and not feel guilty about it. let her really really blossom. i want more eric! maybe he’s in london with jenny, and she’s working on her fashion stuff, and he’s realising that he really wants to be a counsellor. 

some time-skips, maybe. i really want to see dan’s whole thing of being a parent. sending milo to kindergarten and spending the whole time milo’s gone on edge and anxious about everything that could go wrong, while nate comforts him. let nate try to get a job because he no longer has a trust fund, and navigate everything that comes with that. let vanessa be there for him. why the fuck am i phrasing my sentences like this - can you tell that i studied physics once?? oh well.

blair & vanessa handling a lot of things. vanessa meeting harold!! vanessa’s parents being disapproving of blair, but ruby standing up for her. blair & vanessa planning their future properly. blair & vanessa babysitting milo and talking about kids. 

and there can be drama too, there should always be drama. but i would like wholesome stuff at the centre of it too, you know? the ivy/lola nonsense can go on in the background, i don’t actually care that much. as long as ivy doesn’t go around fucking people’s fathers for no understandable or discernable reason, i don’t really care lkdhlfdkhg. (it was just so inexplicable and so random!)

season 6: uh, i don’t know. this was a bad season for everyone in canon, except chuck. i would throw it all away. i would actually love if we had pre-series rufly instead: every time those two bring up their past together i’m like 👀 because it sounds like a dream. or focus entirely on jenny and eric and their life. i am obsessed with jenny and eric being... sort of queerplatonic, sort of like, best friends. there’s no romance and no sex between them (eric’s canonically gay, and jenny’s a lesbian because i said so) but i think the way jenny and eric are is very, very life partners in a way that isn’t romantic OR sexual. so they’d have a little place together and would support each other. and just. what are they up to now? also. kati, iz, penelope, hazel, nelly... what r they doing now? one of the few things i actually liked about s6 as it was was that nelly was that reporter and that she’d found her people in yale. nelly yuki getting a happy and fulfilling ending and being a successful woman was so good and we actually got a little bit of that. i’d like more of that, for the rest of the girls, you know?

[comastoast]

@wuunderstruck​ here’s my rambles of plots for our muses pls lov me:tm:

╰ ☾ ⛧⌒*｡ Cooper Velasquez

( ETHAN MCDONALD, Dylan O’Brien, 23 ) OH MY GOD HE’S A MECHANIC AND I JUST AGGRESSIVELY i was gonna go in order BUT I WANT A TPOSE AND DOBRI BROTP FROM WHEN THEY WERE KIDS AND THEY WORK IN THE SAME MECHANIC SHOP / ETHAN’S SHOP AND JUST them working for hours on end and shooting the shit then going out for drinks after work nd talkin about girls and hard jobs or talk about old cars they wanna buy and flip and just fuckin brodown towntown listen i just got so stoked when i saw cooper was a mechanic pls love me

╰ ☾ ⛧⌒*｡ Addison Cohen

( ALEX HENNY, Herman Tommeraas, 21 ) ugh college bros or a cute lil ship where they’re in all the same classes basically and Alex picks her up in the mornings from her dorm or house with coffee and they sit next to each other in every class and shoot the shit and then Alex convincing her to go to a frat party where they wind up just sitting up on the roof talkin about school & where they’re gonna be in ten years & their lives & ITS JUST A CUTE COLLEGE SHIP

╰ ☾ ⛧⌒*｡ Cameron Hayes

( XAVIER MARTIN, Nat Wolff, 23 ) OK SO I CAN TOTALLY SEE THEM DOIN SKETCHY STUFF TOGETHER because a few of their things line up besides hacker but with how loner-y Xavier is I can imagine him being a hacker with or against Cameron??? ANd they can either be squad and late nights tryin’a hack into something or little shitty hacking games and they have this abandoned house where they meet up and we can even go full Mr. Robot where they’re tryin’a take down the government

( NOLAN GRAND, Aaron Tveit, 25 ) I saw good punches and i was like oo boi either they hate eachother nd fight all the time or they bros and they go out and get into fights with other people / they’re eachothers wingmen like gimmie those VIBES BRO

╰ ☾ ⛧⌒*｡ Fallon Birch

( MAGS O’SULLIVAN, Saoirse Ronan, 23 ) Ok the simple ‘feeling of beginning again’ was enough for me for these two bc Mags is the feeling of the first day of summer so I feel like they’re both like that burst of freedom(?) but either way I definitely want a lowkey long-distance ex girlfriend for Mags and I don’t know if Fallon could fall into that but imagine the cute letters and the phone calls and late night texts bc maybe they broke up bc Fallon moved out of state or Mags moved away or something and the whole ‘i still feel for you but the distance is KILLING ME’

╰ ☾ ⛧⌒*｡ Jacqueline "Jack" Belmont

( MILO SHEPARD, Nick Jonas, 24 ) ugh just imagine she’s his usual bartender and he actively goes when he knows she’s working because for some reason he just feels like she actually sees him despite the fact the only people who ever talk to him / “see” him only view him as that guy who took their kids away from them bc apparently they’re not good parents and Milo & Jack have this nice bond where they sort of talk about their days but it’s vague and it’s usually really later on at night when there’s no one really in the bar besides the usual drunks & dudes lookin to get laid but Milo is strictly there just to unwind after long days or incredibly rough cases and they just have this refreshing bond

( OPHELIA MONROE, Billie Lourd, 22. ) UGH THEY BOTH WORK AT THE ANIMAL SHELTER AND BOND OVER THE POOR ANIMALS and lowkey they both talk eachother out of adopting anymore animals bc you know Ophie has like three dogs and four cats and it’s dramatic but she just keeps feeling so bad for the poor babies who can’t find homes so she takes them and Ophie and Jack go for walks / take their animals out and they’re just girl squad goals as FUCK

 ╰ ☾ ⛧⌒*｡ Rowan Penn

( JACKSON ALLEN, Daniel Sharman, 23 ) I’m A Slut For This Ship Okay Please Just Love Me but imagine they met one night when he was drunk and going to a diner and she just happened to be there and Jack mistook her for an old friend of his but he refused to listen to her deny she was that friend and they start talking and it’s an awkward like ‘i’m not who you think i am but you’re so drunk and kinda bein cute talkin about the old days so i’m not gonna stop you’ but the next day he wakes up and he’s like ‘oh my god i just told you all these embarrassing stories and you’re not even who i THOUGHT YOU WERE WHAS GOING ON.’ but they develop a friendship off it / possibly a slowburn or even a FAST BURN like WHATEVER YOU WANT

( LENNON, Jaria Burns, 23 ) YOUTUBE SQUAD, ROWAN IS ACTUALLY LENNON’S INSPIRATION, LIKE HER TOTAL MVP / ROLEMODEL AND THEY MEET AND LENNON IS JUST LIKE A HOT MESS LIKE ‘rowan god damn penn i have been in love w you for YEARS’ just like a total fan and they do a few video collabs and it can either be GREAT and they become BEST friends or it can go HORRIBLY and they lowkey hate eachother but have to pretend to be nice to not ruin eachothers reputations

╰ ☾ ⛧⌒*｡ plots off your wishlist !!

During a bank robbery you’re surprised when the criminals seem to recognize you and retreat in fear. Only later do you learn that your high school sweet-heart now runs a global crime syndicate and has you placed on a “No Harm” list. You decide to pay them a visit after all these years. ( I can definitely see Mitch being the one who put one of your muses on the ‘no harm’ list, I rec lola jade park or marley birch !! )

hey, gimme a mlm or wlw plot where they both work for a company like buzzfeed or sourcefed (rest in peace ;( ), and do videos and bits together and are vv cute and everyone thinks so and tbh, they do too but they’re also losers who never do anything about it so they use their status as internet personalities as excuses to be w each other (like date night vlogs ?? find the best place in the city to wind and dine). and they’re just v cute and slow burn w lots of tension. ( BIH SHUT UP LENNON & ROWAN VIBES )

ok but a ‘your apartment is next to/above mine & i can hear you & your partner dancing & singing & the bed moving & you two laughing & talking in hushed tones & it won’t let me sleep so i bitch about it to you 24/7 & then one day it just stops & one day turns into one week & then months & i haven’t seen you smile in forever please let me in, i’ve been knocking for ten minutes’ au. ( SCREAMS HEATH & JACK OR KAZ & TATE just imagine the angst )

i just want a damaged, broken boy who doesn’t have a lot of friends & keeps to himself & a caring, kind girl who takes interest in him & gets him to open up & rocks him in her lap when he can’t stop crying & rubs his back when he has nightmares & teaches him that it’s okay to show his pain because being strong doesn’t have to mean hiding your emotions please give me this ( I can definitely see Xavier being the sad boi & any of your girls consoling him or even Milo being the sad boy bc his job is so rough OR I can see Colby taking care of one of your sad bois or Lily because they’re both that soft lemme hold ur hand for a bit ok )

is anyone down to make an m/f platonic af brotp. where they go on lil friend lunch dates, randomly show up @ each other’s places, and stay up late talking shit about their shitty date they just went on. and they fight like a married couple and hold grudges against each other. but if someone were to fuck with one of them, the other would be like “wait bitch, only i’m allowed to do that.” ( GIRL WTF PLEASE GIVE ME A BROTP FOR LENNON, MAGS, ETHAN OR XAVIER LIKE DAMN IM HERE FOR 50 OF THESE THREADS PLATONIC BROTPS ARE MY AESTHETIC )

[mrs-nate-humphrey]

I’ve never personally been a fan of Derena after s1, but reading your posts made me sympathize a bit. I totally agree that them just being friends would be so nice. I hated the whole Serena pining after Dan in s5, it honestly felt like she only wanted him cause he didn’t want her. What do you make of Serena during the dair arc?

hi!! finally i have been re-united with my laptop and i can get to this ask! ngl, i was so excited to see it in my inbox, because i have a Lot of Thoughts about serena during the dair arc (some of which people have said before me, as some old LJ comments can probably testify, haha.) 

this got very long and very serena centric *raises a mug of tea* cheers!

serena pining after dan and chasing after him like that was... i hated it too, and it made me.. uncomfortable is the best word i have for it, but also really deeply sad? i joke about serena’s ‘evil arc’ but as someone who genuinely loves her character and wanted good things for her, it was so painful to see her hurting so much and, instead of coping with that hurt in a mature way, causing harm to the people around her (two of whom she canonically loved very much; two of her favourite people in the world.)

the way i felt about serena during the dair arc was very much like... her reacting badly and not being sympathetic actually did make sense. i wasn’t a fan of how the show handled it and portrayed it, but given everything that happened with her in s3 and s4, i do think some kind of fallout was warranted and expected. everything that happened with lily, william and the fake cancer plotline was really messed up, and serena had spent majority of her life waiting for her dad to come back, and - i think we can blame lily for not being a particularly good (or present) parent, but i think serena had this very strong feeling that her dad coming back would somehow fix their family, or something like that. instead, his coming back caused a very new level of van der woodsen fuckery, and i think that would’ve been extremely traumatic for serena.

it’s also worth noticing that she doesn’t spend time after breaking up with nate in s3 to work on herself. she recognises that she needs to, recognises that she needs some time to recover and really find herself again. but s4 rolls around and she’s still feeling lost. going to paris with blair is fun for serena, but it’s also an escape - she’s actively not dealing with the stuff that’s happened, which i think is part of why her behaviour in early s4 is so chaotic and messy - leaving dan & nate hanging like that is.... mean. she should’ve been honest with them, she should’ve made a choice, even if that choice was ‘neither of you, i need more time, sorry’ or ‘hey, i’m not really sure yet, you shouldn’t have to wait for me to choose’.  

i’ve said stuff very vaguely, mostly in tags, about serena & dan being very emotionally unintelligent, and i think this is serena’s emotional unintelligence - she wants things to be okay and alright again, but she doesn’t want to face her trauma and her insecurities to get through it (which... trauma is fucked up so i do understand that.) i think that’s what makes her such a sympathetic character to me. like, serena, you can run away from everything, but you can’t run away from  yourself + your issues. you have to face them!! but she doesn’t really know how. nobody’s taught her this.

we’ve already gone into serena’s abandonment issues quite a bit, but i think serena during the dair arc was mostly those issues flaring up + the build-up of a lot of trauma re: the thing with her dad (that she was pretending not to see), serena feeling abandoned & lost because the only two people who she’s really ever thought of as ‘hers’, blair and dan, suddenly care about each other in a way that excludes her. we talk about the “dan and i have a real connection” thing in a dair way all the time, but the first time i saw that i was like “HELL YES” for dan and blair but like “ohhhhh noooo” for serena because the whole ‘we do things together that we could never do with you’ - which, i don’t think blair even meant in a hurtful way, but was probably the worst thing blair could’ve said to serena at the time?? 

it’s also worth noting that serena and dan keep going to each other when they’re at their lowest. serena reaches out to dan over the william thing, even though william majorly fucked over rufus, even though serena was dating nate at the time, it was dan she turned to then. when georgina takes milo away, dan immediately goes to serena, and she’s like, how are you, and he denies feeling bad about it, and serena (who probably knows dan well enough to know that it’s bullshit) humours him and goes “okay, let’s not talk about it” which nobody else was really doing at the time, which is why he went to serena. serena and dan’s high school relationship was very sweet and uncomplicated and i find it interesting (& a little sad, tbh) that when things go bad in either of their lives, both of them sort of immediately reach out for the other, almost like they’re trying to recreate the way their relationship was at the very beginning. gossipgirls has some great meta on this.

there’s probably also some jealousy over like.. dan and blair having found some stability and happiness with each other (without her! she’s no longer the person dan or blair loves the most and that hurts!) - and that they’ve found this stability while she still feels so lost and she’s drifting so much. serena’s gradual evolution into someone who really cared about being a socialite (??) and her reputation (to the extent that she was screwing lola over for her own benefit) felt very... drowning man clutching at straws-ish. like she’s lost everything else, might as well hold on to the one thing that she has.

this made me sad because i feel like... she still had dan. he didn’t want to be her boyfriend, he didn’t have romantic feelings for her, and he didn’t want to have sex with her. but he was still very much her friend. he confided in her!! he spoke to her about blair more openly than he did with anyone else (nate was right there, it’s not like the only person dan had in his corner was serena - serena was just the easiest person for him to talk to) and i really, really feel like if serena had just been like “dan, i want to be happy for you but i feel so lost, i feel like you and blair don’t need me anymore and i feel so lonely” or whatever... he would’ve understood!! he would’ve helped her through it! you know that bit with blair and serena in the elevator in 3x09? i can’t find the gifs right now Unfortunately but you know the scene im talking about - they both open up and talk and serena is finally honest with blair? i wish she’d gotten something like that with dan in s5 because like... this theme of dan trusting her with his heart (in a platonic way, but STILL, he was being soo honest and vulnerable and open with her) and her just being all supportive on the outside and sabotagey on the inside... like.. i didn’t like that for her, and i honestly think the level of evil they dialed it up to was cartoon villainny and very ooc for serena. 

i DO see her having resistance and insecurity to the dair arc, but the sort of dishonesty and antics she was pulling felt so wrong and so un-serena, even in the light of all the trauma and the context to her acting out. the shephard divorce thing especially... serena spends so much of the earlier seasons feeling guilty and hating herself over the shephard wedding and the thing with nate. i don’t think she would do that again in any capacity - forgetting blair for a moment, i don’t think she would do that to herself. she hated the person she’d become back then & i do think serena is more strong-willed than most of us give her credit for (filming dan without his consent like that is a georgina move, it’s not a serena move.) 

as for leaking blair’s diary... i feel like serena and blair have such a complicated and not always healthy friendship (that bit in s2 i think it is where serena says something about ‘im sick of always holding myself back so i don’t outshine you’ and blair is like ‘hey wtf??’ hits very hard because it’s so... understandable from BOTH of their perspectives, like i feel like i can understand how serena’s just been quietly holding onto all this resentment until she can’t be quiet about it anymore and it explodes, and blair’s insecurities make this moment one of her worst fears being actualised. but it’s an impactful moment because it touches upon the complexity of blairena.) serena leaking blair’s diary makes sense - i hate it, but i don’t think it was that ooc, and if that had been her only act of betrayal that would’ve felt a lot more realistic to me, tbh, given the way blair & serena’s relationship is and how often they hurt each other (sometimes even deliberately!!) like i would’ve just been like ‘serena! no!!’ as opposed to ‘that’s not my serena; what is this arc!!!” which is what s5 always makes me feel.